Archetypally, women can feel deep shame and guilt when desiring something strongly like a sweet food. This is partially caused by a misrepresentation of old Biblical stories such as Adam and Eve, which depict the treacherous downfall associated with strong desire. For example, indulging and eating a brownie is seen as bad and something experienced as a “guilty” pleasure. You can really begin to analyze these little negative messages that bombard our consciousness throughout life and culminate in complex neuroses and shame.
What is Appetite?
Appetite is a biologic phenomenon, which is necessary to keep us alive. When I’ve explained the 20-minute meal and how you can eat “anything” when adapting to this meal period, people initially panic. How can we eat anything we want? As I explained in a previous post, how you eat is just as important as what you eat.
The Collective Fear of Appetite
If you love sex, you’re a whore. Have you ever felt bad about your sexual desires? Why? Where did you learn this message? Has sex caused you heartache in the past?
If you love food, you’re a glutton. Where did you learn this? What kind of food makes you a glutton? If you crave sugar, is that “bad” or just a temporary craving that will pass?
If you love money, you’re greedy. All of us need money to survive in most of our modern world so why would we stigmatize this subject with morbidity or scarcity? Isn’t money a common, every day need that we should openly discuss without guilt or preconceived angst?
By invalidating our own appetite and ourselves, we create a false inner prison that must be deconstructed under this new paradigm of acceptance associated with our natural desires.
In addition to trusting our appetite, and ourselves what if we also trusted ourselves, especially our body, to communicate that we are full? What if we started paying attention to messages from our body that are saying “enough, I don’t need anymore”? As I’ve mentioned before this is a continuation of the slowing down process, which enables us to become more “aware” of what is really going on and consequently reacting to the present need.
Some people will binge eat instead of asking love ones to help fulfill their desires. Men and women often use sweets as substitutes for physical touch, love, and sex.
Conclusion about Appetite
In conclusion, begin to assimilate the idea that appetite is natural and healthy. Yes, sometimes you will crave sweets or something unhealthy. If you do, just practice eating the food slower. If you have to eat a bowl of ice cream, take a full twenty minutes to eat that bowl. Over time, this will change “what you eat” in addition to how you eat because you are increasing presence and awareness.
In addition, pay attention to new appetites for new foods. Are you beginning to enjoy a spinach salad more than in the past? Are you slowing down and paying attention to the multitude of flavors in that salad, which you never noticed before because you were in a hurry?
What area possesses your strongest appetite? Is it sex, food, money, etc.? Why do you have a strong appetite in this area? What is the real need you are avoiding? Can you find the clarity and courage to voice your need? These are things to consider moving forward.
The more centered and present you become, the more your appetite will become moderated. The outer always follows the inner. Unfortunately, we get trapped into the habit pattern and belief that says outer things create our inner peace. This is a false belief, a delusion that most of humanity embraces.
“Be still and know that I Am God” is a great statement to investigate and imbibe into your soul. The simplicity behind the message can lead us to a healthier appetite and awareness about our current appetite.